I've lost everyone i know. I let it become like this, i thought it would feel better, it does don't get me wrong, but it still feels bad. I wish i held onto some of it instead of cutting it all off. I didn't realize that it will sting like this. I'm getting older, and I'm still in pain. it doesn't get any better but i have been through this for so long that I'm almost numb to it all. But on the other hand if they were really my friends and if the friendships was worth it for them, they would've held on to this too, but they didn't. So that's that. I want to do so many things but my dark passenger trips and blocks me every single time i attempt to change. Maybe it's all fucked and i gotta learn to be at peace.
waking up to the curses of incorrigible bastards are a norm.. laughing at their idiocy is also a norm.. hahaha.. ------ i can't say that i'm not disappointed, i just didn't expect it to be like this i wish things could be the same as they used to. i don't know.. ------ and i wish you would just tell me.. tell me and i won't bother you again i can be a hell of a persistent bitch if i want but i'm tired of chasing you.. i see no point in doing that anymore no point.. ------ and to the women that took care of me my whole life, not being ungrateful or what, but, you are such a bitch sometimes.. i know i have no right in calling u that but you just make yourself hate-able sometimes thanks a lot f***** ------ do girls come with manuals, pissing me off, really! must i be cautious of what i say? Fuck it! ------ "i miss my past, i hate my present, i can't wait for my future." "i'm lying if i say i don't need you, cause i really do, but it doesn...
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