It's always easy to blame others. I know how it feels to be blamed. That was a part of my life I regretted going through, doing bad things. I know it's always easy to point the finger to someone who has committed it before but don't you think that if he didn't do it you're just piling in more pain, more guilt into him. Cos there's no way for him to deny it and you believing him. Put yourself in his shoes, feel his pain, feel his anger. Even though he did all those things before in his teen, don't you think he could have change and maybe it's you who misplace it. The feeling when your own family don't trust you, don't believe your words, give you that dirty look, the feeling just makes you want to kill yourself. I know I'm the one to be blamed cos I put myself in this situation but I try to change, be good. No one notice my attempts to turn over a new leaf, I try so hard. All I ask is to give me a chance.
what would be better if everything is to end now for this pathetic excuse of a life and a waste of space of an existence that i call life now. 1. No more pain in my heart and head. 2. No more stressing about money, about being able to afford dinner tonight. 3. Just be free in the nothingness of the darkness. 4. Can't be a disappointment and a failure when there is nothing in the dark huh -- what is the word that describes the pain in your heart and soul that is beyond thought? i am the poison, that's why people leave me. i hope that this gets me through one more day.
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