Skip to main content
results are back,
and i failed like shit..
seriously..i know i'm dumb..
but THIS dumb..come on..
i can't even bear to see the pink slip ever again..
i don't wanna sound like a sissy but..
even i disappoint myself..
there's no other words to describe it..
i'm so lost..
i need to get on with my fucking life.
and maybe things don't come my way cause' i forget HIM
i don't think of him, i don't thank him..
i feel like i have to prove something to everybody..
your faces say it all...it hit me..i let you guys down
i let myself down, maybe i'm crapping
and my head is playing with me..
i replayed all kinds of scenario of what could happen..
it's just that i missed the part where i would fail badly..
damn it..
i'm just lucky to have friends like qua, faz, mira, eri, jup, faritz
and lately khairi..yes...thanks for the encouragements,
that's all i need for now..
u tend to take granted of things and
only begin to realize your mistakes
once you notice they are all slipping away..
and that's when it's too late..
ok..i guess..now i need time to get my shit together.
----------------------------------
"and all of the love i threw away,
and all of the hopes I've cherished fades,
making the same mistakes again,
making the same mistakes again"
----------------
Listening to: Oasis - The Masterplan
via FoxyTunes

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

These past few days has been shittier than normal. How do you stay positive? Maybe it's all the junk i stuff in my face, hoping to fill the big motherfucking hole in my life. I'm so deep in the hole that the light goes in and out for a split second before it disappears and leave me, There was a time when i used to look forward to the future, but my body physically cringes at the thought of trying to live for another day, i sit here and wait for things to change which i know that it fucking won't but i still wait. I have cut ties from everyone that i know, all the "family and friends" but the truth is sometimes they are the ones who cut ties with me, it's hard being honest with myself cos sometimes i lie to myself to just make it through the day, that people around me actually gave a fuck but they don't. am i a narcissist? the thoughts in my head gets so deafening that i prefer silence most of the time. and when it all dials down i need to blast music in my...
Post a Comment
Read more
i feel it all going away, i closed my eyes and my youth is gone and i am old now, with nothing to my name, my shadow being my only company. my dreams get darker by the day, the crevice where my soul should be gets emptier and more hollow. but in my darkest times, memories of people i consider family at one point in my life crosses my mind and before my heart breaks everything seemed okay for that couple of minutes, and then reality sets in. and everything comes into focus how do you go on and pretend everything's okay when you know deep down inside that it's better off dying than to be alone. i have been alone for so long that i find myself actively avoiding everyone even though i want to be around people that want me to be around but that does not exist. everyone leaves eventually and i hate that it's still painful whenever it comes to mind, people i consider friends and family ghosting and eventually i am alone. Maybe that's how my life is supposed to end up, tired an...
Post a Comment
Read more
How is it my fault that you guys go broke? I didn't ask you to invest in that business.. Remember it's your mistakes, not mine. I can't go to school cos you sending her go overseas and shit, I have to work and support myself and help with the bills? Tell me which part of it is fair? I try to not ask money all the time but please use your brain, I don't have to eat? I don't have to spend money when I go out? Is that your idea of fair? Might as well I move out, live on my own since I have to pay for everything. At least if I do that I have a place to call my own, I have no privacy here, I have no room, I hate sleeping on the floor, you know how sucky that is, every fucking day, son of a bitch, no one understand my needs and shit, and you call yourselves my family, no man, that is total bullshit.
Post a Comment
Read more